如何讓朋友/夥伴停止發短信給我毫無意義的圖片/視頻


84

我有幾個親密的朋友,包括我的伴侶,他們經常給我發完全隨機的圖片或視頻給我發短信,這些圖片或視頻是他們在互聯網上發現的。例如,一段2分鐘的視頻,顯示了充滿小狗的游泳池或哈哈貓模因。我覺得這很煩人,但是多年來,我的反應是要么忽略它,假裝自己太忙了,要么用一個單詞回答,例如" haha​​"," lol"," cute"。答复(或決定是否答复)對我來說總是很壓力,因為它感覺很虛假,我一生都在浪費一些時間在想:"也許我應該告訴他們我的真實感受,因為他們似乎無法弄清楚是因為我缺乏熱情,或者是我從來沒有回報過。"但是最後,我通常只回答一個單詞,因為我不想傷害任何人的感受,也不想讓他們停止發短信給我。

我估計,每個這些朋友平均每天都會發生一次。有時他們跳過一天,有時我可能一天之內從一個朋友那裡得到5分。有時無意的入侵是通過電子郵件或Facebook進行的,但最常見的是通過文本進行的。有時,入侵不僅涉及圖片或短視頻,還涉及更多內容:可能是20分鐘的視頻或我應該閱讀的內容。當他們他們相互收到此類消息時,我就在場,似乎他們的回應通常是" AWWW,好可愛!"的混合體和"是的,我的朋友看到​​一個隨機的可愛/有趣的東西,並想到了我!"。因此,我了解到他們希望我在寄給我這些東西時有這種感覺,我對此表示讚賞。

所以我的問題可以歸結為:

我如何讓我的朋友和伴侶停止發短信給我隨機的可愛/有趣的圖片/視頻/鏈接,這種方式在理想情況下不會過度傷害他們的感覺或導致他們停止與我聯繫我喜歡其他方式嗎?

在這一點上,我還需要以某種方式解決這樣一個事實,即我多年來一直沒有受到困擾(也許他們甚至基於我的積極回應而覺得我有點喜歡)。

67

Welcome to the wise and wonderful world of being a curmudgeon. It's ok many of us stayed in the closet for years, but at some point, you just gotta embrace your inner angry old person and let it out.

Ok... Mostly joking... Mostly...

I've been a curmudgeon for a long time now. I have expressed open disdain and disappointment with/for lol cats for as long as that's been a thing.

The two methods I find most successful in stopping the rising meme tide; are as you mentioned one-word responses, and finding my own darker and slightly off putting memes.

The one-word responses thing simply needs to feel like a very subtle mix of indifference and being very slightly patronizing. It's as simple as replacing "haha" with

Ha...
Meh...

It's a cultivated skill to use these, so tread slowly and carefully. People will accuse you of being an inhuman monster for not liking puppies in a kiddie pool. You gotta ease into it.

The other method is a little more advanced, but it can be fun with the right sort of people. Find memes that express how you feel about the meme or video presented. If it's indifference that's heavily covered and easy to find, as are irritation, and simple mockery. I'd share a few of mine, but I'm pretty sure they would violate the "be nice" policy.

Be warned retaliatory memes are for people who can roll with cynical, sarcastic, and dark. If your people are easily upset, I would ease into the indifferent one-word responses.


18

Maybe try being honest with them. Instead of short replies, I say things about what I got & try to stay polite, but not convey any sense of enjoyment. I might say something like

Hey so you know I am not really one to love puppies, but send me all the dark memes you got. Maybe something like this...

And then send them one you love.

I like having a laugh. I think most people do. If you can send me something I enjoy, then I am unlikely to find it so irritating. Likewise, I don't love when someone sends me some link they want me to watch/read so we can discuss, and it's going to take 1-2 hours to look through it. Sometimes I am open to that if we have both shown interest and this will add to the previous conversation. More often, it's something I have no interest in at the moment and no time I am willing to devote to it. Instead, I might say back then,

Hey, sorry, but if I get 1-2hrs of true downtime I am dying to watch this movie, look at the inside of my eyelids (sleep), take a super long bath, etc and this is too heavy for anything I had in mind.

And honestly, most people I know, know that I don't want to be contacted for such things because I have said so. I am busy. When I get a ping, I don't want to stop what I am doing because I was waiting on an important reply to grab my phone and see some weird thing about a cat and a bear that have become best friends. It's not the sort of thing that helps me have a better day. Now if you want to send me some meme that takes Winnie the Pooh and turns him into a Hannibal Lecter scene, have at it. I find that very appropriate to my sense of humor and to the fact that I sort of want to die if I have to watch Pooh one more time.


6

It happens to me sometimes. I happen to give my number to a co-worker or a company driver for some reason. But then they start forwarding all kinds of timepass posts on WhatsApp to me. Some even add me to their groups out of the blue.

In most cases, I tolerate it for a few days. Then I leave the group without speaking a word, hoping they either don't notice it or, even if they did, hoping that they'll understand why I don't feel like continuing there.

Sometimes people add me to their WhatsApp broadcast lists, and I'll get a dozen clips and memes sent to me.

Quite often, I resort to sending them a private message,

I don't look at such messages, or I don't have the time or mind to read these. Please avoid sending me these. Feel free to contact me for anything else though. :)

It mostly works without causing any issues, but sometimes in some cases, the person either doesn't notice or doesn't heed my message, and continues bothering me with such forwarded posts, so I quite simply block them on WhatsApp.


13

I find 99% memes unfunny and 100% cute kitty pictures leave me totally indifferent… Does the world still spin? Has the sun stopped shining? Do I receive a meme or a cute kitty image every day? Do I still have friends? Yes. No. No. Yes.

"Maybe I should tell them how I really feel, since they can't seem to figure it out from my lack of enthusiasm or the fact that I have never once reciprocated". But in the end, I usually go with one of my one-word answers because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings and I don't want them to stop texting me about other things.

If the words in bold are true then it will be easier to send everyone the same message, adjust the phrasing and wording to your taste and style but in your situation I would say something along these lines

Hi everybody, I have a confession to make.
For months, friends and family have been forwarding the same memes and LOL cats images, etc. to me. Arggghhhh! :) I love 'em, really I do but it's come to the point where I feel irritation rather than a warm fuzzy glow whenever I get a meme I have seen hundreds of times.

Don't say it's been years, it would be mortifying to anyone to hear that. Months suggests that until recently you appreciated your friends' messages and jokes but you are now at tilting point.

I've never said anything before because I love keeping in touch with you all, and sometimes the jokes you send are hilarious but for the time being, could I ask you to please stop forwarding me these memes, funny e-cards, lol cats, etc.?

I need to detox myself, seriously. Oh, and if anyone by mistake does send me a funny card, don't worry, I won't get annoyed but please don't be offended if I fail to respond with a "Thank you". OK?

Thanks! Love you all.

Hopefully, close friends and wise acquaintances will interpret the above message as saying: "Quit sending me stuff that I couldn't care less about" and delete your name from their mailing lists.

If you do decide to adopt this approach, please keep us up-to-date and tell us if it worked and if you still have friends and family who continue to talk to you. :)


7

Just be honest. It's up to you whether you want to send a group text, or individual messages to each frequent offender, or discuss it in person with some. But you can try to emphasize the positive in your request.

Hey [name/everyone]. I've got to admit something that might sound a little strange: I usually don't enjoy the typical random cute and funny things that go all around the Internet. I really appreciate the sentiment that you wanted to include me in something that made you smile. But sometimes I even get annoyed at just receiving too many of the darn things. Could I just ask that you don't include me any more when you pass around the random Internet memes, videos, articles, and so on? In any case, looking forward to seeing you [soon/at specific event].

I wouldn't bring up your past reactions in this message / discussion. It's probably not as big a deal as you imagine. Some friends probably won't even notice the incongruity. If they do, it's not that hard to put it together that you were sometimes just being polite. And that's pretty much a socially acceptable type of lie, similar to answering "How are you?" with "Fine" even if you actually feel rotten (but it may not be the correct time or person to let that sort of thing out). And if anyone does bring it up:

Well, I was trying to be polite. Sorry if that comes across as insincere.

One more thing: It's entirely acceptable to ignore these sorts of forwards entirely, especially ones that would take time to view like a movie or article. Sending memes and such is mostly a fire-and-forget activity. Usually nobody expects even a "ha" or a Facebook "like" in return. If a friend actually hopes you look at a specific link for some reason, they'll add a comment along the lines of "Hey loris, I thought you might like to see this, because I know you're interested in [X]."


0

People carelessly share such things with everyone who is to slow to run because they want appreciation. Every your 'lol'-like response was seen as a positive feedback. The best way is to be honest. If those messages aren't very annoying, just ignore them, and hope they will get bored if they don't get their pats. Or, hopefully, they will grow up one day.

If it is annoying just say them that you have to silence your phone because constant peeps are not welcomed in your workplace or anywhere and ask to limit sending messages in some hours, or pretend your internet plan is in danger etc.

Anyway, not having to read anything someone has written in internet should not be a concept too difficult to understand for an average adult.


11

Just don't respond.

No one will care and for the few people who do mention it ('didja see my email with the kitten in a bow-tie? wasn't it hilarious?'), just say you prefer lolcode to lolcats.


0

Find a copy of "Stop Forwarding That Crap To Me" by Weird Al Yankovic and send it to them. It's amusing enough to take some of the edge off of your rejection.

Although if that doesn't work, I would go with what was mentioned above: blocking. If "Stop Forwarding That Crap To Me" doesn't work, make a direct complaint, and if that doesn't work or if they start arguing with you, send them a message saying "you are now blocked because you keep sending me unwanted 'cute' content" and then block them. After about a week, unblock them and send them a message saying you have. Repeat as needed (lengthening the duration of the block each time).


1

How do I get my friends and partner to stop texting me random cute/funny pictures/videos/links in a way that ideally won't hurt their feelings too much or cause them to stop reaching out to me in other ways that I like?

  • Aquire reasonable ammo, like images from this webpage of stupid novelty toys or BS images.

  • Install an MMS Auto-reply or SMS AI Bot that sends dull responses.

  • At first review your messages frequently to make sure everything is OK, later check your messages every few hours, or twice a day. Teach them that bandwidth is precious, and so is your time.

If they have something important you'd enjoy hearing from them, but not cry Wolf calls.